“Take positive care of your mind, and it would surely take positive care of your life.”
There is one common thing that I have noticed amongst the many folks that I have trained over the years, and that is their propensity to talk down to themselves.
You know that little critic that lives in your head, telling you that you are too fat, too weak, too pathetic etc? Well it seems that you are not alone my friend, as everyone seems to have one of these voices, regardless of their age or gender.
I had a byline to my Coluccio Fitness personal training business for many years which was “ Lift-Love-Transform.” I felt – and still do – that no amount of lifting weights and eating “clean” would ever make a difference to the person who spoke harshly to them self all day long. Rather, SELF LOVE – as corny as it sounds – is a critical part of the equation if you are ever to truly transform your body / health and life.
With self love, you will value the nutrition, the exercise and the general self-care you undertake.
With self love, you will choose to feed your mind with positive, good things and out of that, you will find yourself able to show love more to those around you.
It sure does and when you truly love yourself, you aren’t so hung up on thinking that everyone else thinks as little of you as you do. You are free to reach out, to be authentically you and to love and be a blessing to others. You won’t have this ability however if you don’t stop to address your inner saboteur – your negative self talk.
So how to begin?
Your self love will increase as your negative self talk decreases – and this starts with you breaking the old patterns in order to replace that inner chatter with positive input. As with any new habit, things might take a little while to really become automatic, however with intentional practise, you will soon discover that your self love – along with your self belief and self confidence – develops way stronger than ever before.
I’m all for practical action so here are 3 easy activities that you can begin right away to help you start changing the way that you speak to yourself:
1.Begin with your “I Ams.” I am such a believer in this activity and have seen it impact many lives over the years. Begin with writing down everything that you hate about yourself. Yes – really! Your list might include “I am fat.” “I am dumb” “I am boring.” Now pull out a second piece of paper and write down the complete opposite to that list. E.g: “I am the perfect body shape for me.” “I am intelligent.” “I am interesting.” Tear that first list up and throw it out. The second list is now who you are – and it is time for you to believe it!
2. Commit to 30 days of reading your list of “I Ams” aloud in front of a mirror. You need to see the person you are speaking to and address them with the same love and care that you would extend to someone else that you were encouraging. Try to do this exercise morning and night – I’ve even had clients tape their “I AM” statements to their mirrors so that they see them every time that they look in the mirror.
3. Reframe your language. How you talk about yourself aloud is a reflection of your inner voice. If you find yourself saying to other people sentences such as “I’m useless with exercise programs – I never stick to them…” pull yourself up and change your wording immediately. For example: “I haven’t yet found the right exercise program for me, but I’m determined to find it and stick with it!” Or change “I’m so terrible at managing my time” to “I’m learning to prioritise things in my life.” As your outer language consciously becomes more positive and self-affirming, so will your inner language.
These are just a few easy steps for you to get started with, but over time, they have the potential to create habits in your self-talk that will impact your life – and the lives of those around you – for the better, so why not make this the year where you choose to change the way in which you talk to yourself?
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