There’s a lot of talk online about midlife reinvention. I should know – I use the expression all the time and seem to be drawn to it like a moth to the flame when looking for articles to read or podcasts to listen to. In my mind, it is an exciting, delicious thought that someone can re-invent themself – regardless of age – however be warned, reinvention is NEVER a one time thing!
Life is so full of twists and turns. The unexpected bites you in the butt many a time: you lose a job, your partner leaves you for a girl barely out of puberty, you fall ill, you break your ankle falling down that one and only frigging step in your house, (yes, that was me!) your adult child turns up on your doorstep, bag in hand announcing that they need to move back home………the list of possibilities is endless.
So what do you do? You either adapt or fall apart – and negotiating midlife is exactly the same. You can waste your time and your sanity railing against the indignities of finding black hairs on your chin, grey hairs on your head and the nuclear reactor that keeps overheating your body OR you can choose to adapt and reinvent yourself, over and over again if need be.
I was told at age 44 that I had osteo-arthritis in both of my knees – just at the time that I was in the midst of one of my first definitive midlife reinventions, having taken myself back to school to train as a personal trainer. During that year, my knees had been increasingly sore and I was struggling with some of the fitness elements of our course. I had two choices – chuck in my course as a bad joke, or work around it. I chose the latter, and so began my love-hate relationship with the stationary bike which is far easier on knees, and a closer relationship with my true love – weights. I still managed to lose weight, get strong and complete my course as top of the class despite my setback – but the process took a lot of soul searching and determination.
Just before I turned 50, I realised that something new was brewing inside. A discontent with what I was doing, along with a relentless tug in my heart that I was meant to impact more women than just those that I saw in the gym. I started my facebook page then known as “50 Fit and Fabulous,” and put out a call to others to join me in a fitness challenge as I counted down to my 50th birthday. At a time when most women start to pull back, I was pushing myself out there – no mean feat for an introvert and trust me, my inner critic was screaming herself hoarse.
I’m now a month shy of 52 and that tug in my heart to impact more women has only grown stronger. I’ve stepped so far out of my comfort zone as I gradually become more “visible” than ever online that I almost don’t know anymore what a comfort zone actually feels like. Every day is a challenge in stretching further, in daring to reach out to others, in daring to invest in my own life financially by allowing coaches to input into my life along the way, in posting a photo or a video of myself – of having the AUDACITY to think that I can make a difference at midlife.
And I can.
And so can YOU.
There is no age limit on reinvention. There is no time limit on changing direction, on trying something new, on following the small voice in your spirit that still whispers to you of long postponed dreams.
I have by no means “arrived.” In fact, I don’t actually know if I ever will “arrive” as I am sure that I will be dreaming up new things to try even into my old age. After all, in my mind, the only thing that ever truly stops us adapting, transforming and reinventing is death – so why do we allow ourselves to be defined by a number?
Next month is my birthday month, where I will be pausing to both reflect on the year behind and envision the year ahead. I’m already thinking of where I want to be and what I want to be doing over the next season – and most importantly – who I can help and impact along the way.
Are you in the same boat? Do you relate in being someone who doesn’t want to “settle” at midlife, but who wants to keep transforming and reinventing themself? Over the past few months, I have connected with a number of vibrant midlife women from around the world – both in my Fabulous Midlife Babes tribe and in various other groups, and there seems to be a ground swell of women in this season of life embracing change and reinvention. The outworking of their passions may be different, but the knowledge that life is not over – just different – spurs these women on to create, live and thrive at a time of life when many others are stuck, pining over how their lives and bodies used to be.
I’m intending reinventing myself many more times over the years to come – how about you?
Here’s to Rocking Midlife!
PS. It can be hard undergoing transformative changes on your own – trust me, I know this from experience! I have sought out and found coaches to encourage, motivate and challenge me when I was making changes at different times in my life, and now I am offering the same for you. Totally personalised coaching based on your needs, your desires and your goals. Want to rediscover who you are at midlife, or want to reinvent yourself? Feeling lost, feeling directionless, or simply needing encouragement and someone in your corner to cheer your on and help you find your courage again?
ROCK YOUR LIFE coaching can be be undertaken via Skype or Zoom and involves a weekly 1 hour session followed up by an “action” email from me to you. You determine the need, and together, we find the way forward! Read more HERE.
I’m going through a bit of a re-invention myself at the moment, but just baby-step by baby-step. I was so stuck in a rut of work – home – deal with teens- sleep – work with nothing else, but a recent overseas holiday has kind of snapped me out of it, thankfully! I’ve sort of got 3 goals – plan another mini-holiday with my 2 adult kids, get my sorry arse fitter and healthier and really try hard to get my new blog established and eventually earn a few $$ from it. Thanks for this post, it’s certainly helped with the motivation side of things! Tara x
Can absolutely relate to this Cat. After a 16 year career as an author i’ve walked away from it mostly, it did not fill my soul any more, and i wanted to concentrate on home and hearth and creating an environment that enriches all who live here. However, that said, trying to myself and my health first (given that i have a disability) is still at the bottom of the list. Working on that LOL
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