Cheers to a new year and another chance for us to get it right. – Oprah Winfrey
I have to admit that I will be glad to see the back of 2019. What started out as a year with so much promise, (yes, I was that person who boldly proclaimed that \”this is going to be my best year ever!\” back in January) soon turned out to be a roller-coaster of highs and some pretty huge lows.
2019 began with my winning the National Fast-Track scholarship with the Professional Speakers Association of New Zealand. I was over the moon and life was exciting as I made use of my scholarship winnings, experiencing coaching sessions from some of NZ’s top speaking professionals. I was so inspired and on a mission to make this my breakthrough year for business and life. As I headed to Christchurch to deliver two workshops to the National Certified Builders Association conference in June – I felt that I was on track to achieve this goal.
But then my best-laid plans started to unravel.
30 minutes prior to presenting my second workshop, I received a message notification on my phone. I opened it to find a newspaper announcing that an old friend had been murdered in the UK. Pulling myself together to present that workshop after reading that news was such a challenge.
I returned home and 2 days later received the news that my dearest friend’s breast cancer had metastasized. I cried for 2 days straight, then made some sweeping changes to peel back a lot of the things I had been doing out of obligation to others. I wanted to free up as much time as possible to spend with my friend over the ensuing months.
I only got to see her one more time.
She passed away on the morning of my son’s wedding in July, the highest and the lowest point of my year coinciding on the same day.
In the meantime, my husband’s work situation had been growing increasingly toxic, and he ended up taking redundancy.
He and I took a week out to travel to the Gold Coast in Australia to regroup after the emotional battering of the first half of the year, and that week of having to make no major decisions other than what we would eat for lunch was such a relief.
On returning to cold, wet Auckland however, I discovered that an another old friend had passed away.
I found myself struggling to keep building my workplace training business. I felt like I was wading through mud while carrying the weight of grief on my shoulders, so I pulled back, deciding to focus on just one goal that I had wanted to achieve earlier in the year: to complete and release my book.
October rolled around along with my 54th birthday and I decided that even though it wasn’t a significant birthday, after the previous months of challenge and sadness, I wanted to celebrate life, and was blessed that so many friends joined me. Just 2 days later, my husband and I found ourselves unexpectedly on a plane to Sydney for 2 weeks to deal with a crisis with his father.
We arrived back in Auckland physically and emotionally shattered from that experience and I soon found out that a beautiful lady who I used train in the gym had passed away after an aggressive fight with cancer.
I was beginning to feel like a punching bag, with 2019 being the boxer, pounding me in places that I least expected.
I managed to complete my book 21 Hacks to ROCK your Life! and held a book release in the centre of Auckland in December. I didn’t think that anyone would attend, being such a busy time, so was truly grateful for the wonderful people who came and celebrated with me. This night was a significant one for me as it felt like completing the book was my only real achievement for 2019.
And now, I am sitting here writing this overview of my year on the morning of December 31st. I have only mentioned a few of the challenges that occurred this year – there were so many more, one being the increasing intensity of the chronic pain that I live with, which was the straw that broke the proverbial camel\’s back and had me seriously contemplating if I should give up.
Should I just give up living an entrepreneurial life and go get a job?
Should I just give up wanting to speak and motivate women to live fulfilling, purposeful lives?
Should I just give up and stop kidding myself thinking that I have anything of any worth to offer?
Should I just give up believing that women can still choose joy in the midst of the chaos of life?
There were no flashing lights or angels singing, but what I did have was a small voice inside me whispering that life is a gift – and I still had mine to live.
So I’m choosing to shake the dust off my feet and leave 2019 with all of its highs and lows and its lessons and tribulations behind me.
I’m choosing to move into this new year and new decade, strong in my belief that it is “never too late to have a new beginning in life.”
I’m choosing to celebrate the privilege of getting older which many of my friends have been denied.
I’m choosing to value my family and friends more deeply.
I’m choosing to do all I can to impact and encourage other women, and….
Most of all, I’m choosing to ask myself this question in regards to every book I write, event I hold and presentation I deliver: “Is this the legacy I want to create and leave?”
I suspect that if you sat down and wrote your \”year in review\” story – my challenges would pale in comparison.
The reality is that everyone has a story.
Everyone has experienced physical or emotional pain at some point over the last year and I\’m sure that many have also contemplated throwing in the towel, running away and starting over. The problem being of course that you still have to deal with yourself.
I want to encourage you this New Year\’s Eve to take the time to farewell 2019, accepting the learnings that have come from it and leaving behind the mistakes and the self doubt. As you head into 2020, remind yourself – even on those dark days where you might be wrapped in grief for a lost loved one – that life is a precious gift that you currently own.
Choose to create the life and legacy that you want in the New Year and beyond.
PS: If you really want to kickstart your year with a plan to create your life On-purpose in 2020, but you\’re worried about repeating every other year where you fulfil everyone else\’s agenda but your own, here\’s your answer. I\’m hosting a LIVE workshop in my home in Auckland called \”2020 – Your Life ON-Purpose\” – Create the life and legacy you want for 2020 and beyond on Saturday Jan 18th 2020 at 10 am – 2 pm.
Get all the details HERE.
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